Moms, especially single moms, have a tendency to perform all the possible duties and functions for giving their children and other family due care, but at the same time we forget to take care of ourselves. We work like machines almost twenty four hours a day and seven days a week, ignoring sudden pains in our head, muscle cramps, joint pains, and overall bad feeling and fatigue. No matter what we do and what burden of responsibilities lies on you, you just have to take care of yourself; otherwise you will just break down. Nothing should prevent you from remembering your desires, your needs, your dreams, and most importantly – the fact that first of all you are a woman.

On the other hand, you can object by saying that there is no one else to do certain things that you do, and that you simply have no choice. It is very noble and kind of you to be a caring mother and wife – we all are trying our best to be so, but it is the greatest deception of all the women that they have no time for themselves. There always is time, no matter what you do, and you have to keep this in mind. If you try to do things you usually do in a more relaxed and calm manner, if you restore the peace in your mind at least for a minute, you will see that the necessary time is appearing as if by magic. There is no way to describe this with words – just try it.

To be more concrete, let’s imagine you have to do all the housework. What is it that prevents you from listening to your favourite music while you work? Why can’t you cook something and read an interesting and positive book meanwhile? Why don’t you have a relaxing aroma bath in the evening just before going to bad? There are plenty of ways in which you can do everything in a relaxed way. And as soon as you are able to use some of these ways in your daily routine, you will see that the time slows down and suddenly out of nowhere a couple of free evening hours will appear, and you can devote them to yourself or go out with your friends or children.

Even if you think that you don’t need any relaxation, even if you don’t love yourself and think that you don’t deserve rest, think of your children and husband, and ask yourself a question – does your husband rather like to see you full of energy, beautiful, sexy and charming, or tired, without makeup and not in the mood? Do your children want you to sacrifice yourself to them, or they love you very much and want you to be healthy and relaxed? I suppose that the whole family cant be happy if at least one of the members just refuses to be happy.

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A century or two ago there was a completely different society than we have now. I mean not only habits and traits; I mean the very concept of society, and family. The society was mainly agricultural, and that is the main factor that determined traditions of each family and the role of its members. Every member of the family was engaged in something that contributed to the household, and each family’s prosperity and wealth depended on the industry of each member. The women’s task was in general to raise the kids and do all the housework, while men occupied the highest positions and played a much more considerable role in the society (at least they think so). Anyway, women stayed at home, men went out of the home. Now the situation has changed dramatically, especially with the women’s role in society.

In the nineteenth century industrialization brought major changes to the lifestyle of people. It affected family as a whole and the role of each member. The home ceased to be the core of the country’s economy, as with time more and more hand labour was replaced by machine labour, and this tendency persists nowadays, leading us towards the full elimination of hand labour sometime in future. This resulted in more and more women going to work out of their homes, especially those having to raise the children on their own.

The women’s role in the society has changed both for the better and for the worse. The better aspect is, of course, that in theory a women now can occupy exactly the same positions and have the same professions with men, and on the surface everything really is fair and right. But in practice this major change has resulted in much more difficulties that could have been foreseen. Motherhood is a very unpopular thing now, and it has stopped being the main function of the family as a whole. People have lost their old values and gained new ones, and this is neither good nor bad, but according to these values a woman nowadays has a burden of responsibilities.

A lot is expected from a woman today, but little is done to help her and ease her life. This is not written in any low and any official document, but women are regarded as inferior sex, whatever men may claim. This can be felt everywhere, especially at work, where most women are forced to struggle with constant disrespect, not obvious to reproach somebody for it, but distinct enough to ignore. There are no words and advice that can instantly change the situation for the better, women just have to go through it and the times will change once more. After all, being a woman is a great gift, and the society will eventually appreciate us, even if not today.

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